Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
