tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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