she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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