I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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