guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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