Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
