i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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