Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize