Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Randomize
