Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'm always down for nudity.
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