He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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