I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize