i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
