ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
