WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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