It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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