ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
did you just send me my own nude
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Randomize
