You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize