everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
