white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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