just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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