I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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