Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
