Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
