Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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