you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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