let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
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