Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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