we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
