It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
