I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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