super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Randomize
