i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
