If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
