when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
