sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
