My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
