I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
No...this little piggys going to the bar
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
