Whod you bang
I think I am morally bankrupt
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize