We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
