It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
She announced her abortion via fbk
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize