Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
