Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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