His pubic hair was longer than his dick
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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