Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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