I feel great
I just peed on a car
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
