I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
my nose is crying tears of wow.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
