I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
