I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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