The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Blow job season was short but glorious.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
