Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Randomize
