Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I'm just crazy horny about you
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize